Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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