You're completely useless in the revolution.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
