at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
