I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
