Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
