We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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