You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Randomize
