any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
