Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
