i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
