This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize