I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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