Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
The Olympian is in my bed
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I think my moral compass just broke
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize