Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
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