Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
pop tarts are not kleenex
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize