I puked a lego.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Randomize
