So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
