haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
