An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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