i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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