Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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