is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
