I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
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