Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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