Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I intend to get homeless drunk
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Randomize
