he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
