I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
