So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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