The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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