How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
