that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
