How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
He? As in you personified your dick?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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