Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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