I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
you told grandpa to call you daddy
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
