She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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