You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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