I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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