i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize