you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
