I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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