is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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