My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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