I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
The dick lei will go down in squad history
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
