I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
