I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize