Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
