my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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