Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize