you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
