How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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