Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
